No other language has as many names for relatives as Russian. It’s not even worth talking about the banal father-in-law, mother-in-law, brother-in-law and son-in-law, everyone knows who they are. But did you know, for example, that the husbands of two sisters are each other’s brothers-in-law, and the wives of two brothers are brothers-in-law? It is interesting that in the Russian language there are very apt and caustic proverbs and sayings that reflect difficult relationship within the family. For example: “city godfathers are arrogant”, “as perky as a mother-in-law”, “mother-in-law has skinny pockets”.
But today we will focus on one relative - her husband’s sister, or sister-in-law. Do you know how they have long said about her husband’s sister? Sister-in-law - sister-in-law or sister-in-law - reel! And they also said: “the sister-in-law’s speeches are worthless.” What did this relative do to deserve such an attitude?
The sister of a husband and wife almost always have a difficult relationship. This is the same well-known conflict as in the “mother-in-law - son-in-law” or “mother-in-law - daughter-in-law” relationship. At the same time, wives usually consider themselves the suffering party: they are convinced that sisters-in-law allow themselves to interfere in the personal lives of spouses, in their everyday life, in raising children and managing the family budget. At the same time, the sisters-in-law themselves are quite often perplexed: they sincerely believe that they have every right to do this. This is why wives usually keep communication with their sisters-in-law to a minimum, or at least try to do so. And even the need for a husband once or twice a year turns into a real problem, conflicts are so acute.
The reason for this situation is a banal misunderstanding of the parties, unwillingness to accept each other’s position. And the injured party is usually the husband. Let's try to understand what lies at the root of this misunderstanding.
A husband's sister may treat her brother differently. Firstly, she can associate herself with her mother ( older sister or simply more mature as a person). In this case, she will treat her brother kindly and condescendingly and allow herself to interfere in his life. The extent of this interference will depend on her tact and how much she is allowed to do it. Also, the husband’s sister can project the image of her father onto her brother, trying on him as a protector. Consequently, she will claim her rights to his participation in her life, while not at all taking into account his changed. Often, a wife associates this situation with complete selfishness, but sometimes the sister-in-law simply did not have time to realize all the changes. Another problem with this situation is that the husband’s sister continues to use his things and money, without any regard for her brother’s wife. Remember what they said - “sister-in-law-reel”. This is the side of the issue that we are talking about: the husband’s sister still believes that she has the right to use her brother’s money (his apartment, car, dacha, etc.) as if it were her own things. Her position is easy to understand: she is used to doing this, and is not going to change her habits for the sake of some “stranger” woman.
The most neutral option is a friendly relationship between sister and brother. But even in this case, conflicts arise, most often due to banal jealousy. Moreover, she can be jealous like her husband’s sister new woman in the life of a brother, and the wife of her husband to relatives in general and to her sister-in-law in particular.
Is there a way out of this situation? I would like to say that there is, but this is not entirely true. In order to avoid such a development of events, it is necessary for both sides of the conflict to abstract from emotions, which is practically impossible. And yet, you should at least try to take a step towards each other: talk, try to understand, identify the most pressing moments. This must be done, otherwise one of two things will happen: either one woman will lose her husband, or the other will lose her brother.
Mom will always come first in a husband’s heart, and only then his wife. And the strength of the marriage often depends on how the relationship between the daughter-in-law and mother-in-law develops. There are often cases when disagreements between women are the cause of family breakdown. In this article we will tell you why mothers-in-law do not like daughters-in-law. We will also look at possible ways to solve the problem. In addition, the article will present advice from psychologists and astrologers.
Money
Why don't mothers-in-law like daughters-in-law? After such a long-awaited event as marriage, a woman finds not only a husband. Not the last place in a newly formed family should be given to the mother-in-law. And it’s good if mutual understanding and friendship immediately arises between the ladies. But what about mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, if a good relationship does not work out? Let's look at common causes of strife.
Money has always occupied an important place in the life of every person. And therefore, if a girl is lower in status than her husband, then we can expect dissatisfaction from her mother-in-law. For example, that a girl married not for love, but for money, an apartment or registration (if the girl is from a small village and the groom is from a large city). And perhaps her husband’s mother is not so sorry for the money as she is worried about how her friends will look at such a union.
If such a situation arises, then you just need to ignore the mother-in-law’s attacks, and for this you will have to stock up on considerable patience. It is best to start building your career yourself, without the help of your husband.
Some people advise giving birth to a child in order to switch the mother-in-law’s attention to him. But this is not always the way out. If a mother has a strong influence on her husband and does not accept her daughter-in-law, then in the future you can lose not only your husband, but also your child.
Or she may begin to take out her negativity on the baby. In this case, the question will sound different: “Why don’t mother-in-law like their daughter-in-law and grandchildren?” It is better not to rush to have children until an approach to your spouse’s mother is found.
Other nationality
The reason for the mother-in-law's hostility may be that the daughter-in-law is of a different nationality. Often women are ready to adamantly honor family traditions and do everything possible to quarrel between the young people. And even more so, they will try to do everything so that there is no mixing of blood and no child is born.
Then what to do if the mother-in-law does not like her daughter-in-law because of her nationality? Here you can fight back only through joint efforts with your husband. If possible, it is better to go to another city, since mutual love is unlikely to arise. But such a mother-in-law will be able to spoil a girl’s nerves.
Jealousy
Of course, the most obvious reason why mothers-in-law do not like their daughters-in-law is jealousy. It is especially pronounced if the son is the only child in the family. And even more so if the mother-in-law is left without a husband. The mother does not want to share her son's love with anyone else. She is afraid of losing his attention and wants to remain in first place for him. This may manifest itself in the fact that the mother-in-law will call her son to her with or without reason (she is sick, she needs to move a closet, or she is simply really bored).
In this case, it is better for the daughter-in-law not to try to take the mother’s place in the heart of her husband. Do not interfere with the mother-in-law’s communication with her son, and sometimes it is even better to let them see each other alone. Join their family gradually. It’s great if the firstborn is a boy. Then the mother-in-law will switch her love and attention to her grandson. Don’t forget to spend all the big holidays with her. Asking your mother-in-law for advice about your husband (for example, what to buy him for his birthday, how to cook his favorite dish), doing things together and having troubles will help you get closer.
Mother took the position of head
When living together, disagreements may arise due to the fact that the husband's mother will occupy the position of head and will not allow the daughter-in-law to make independent decisions in household matters. There are even a number of quotes about a mother-in-law who does not love her daughter-in-law.
There should not be two mistresses in a house.
Love for your husband's mother must be measured in kilometers.
An annoying mother-in-law and half the city will not be an obstacle.
Usually the way out of the situation is simple - you need to move away from your mother-in-law. If it is not possible to buy an apartment, then you can rent it. If you stay at a distance from each other and do not encroach on the territory of your husband’s mother, she may calm down and even perhaps try to establish normal family relationships. It often happens that the daughter-in-law and mother-in-law got along well with each other, but as soon as they moved in together, scandals began.
Fight for love
A mother-in-law's dislike may arise as a result of a struggle over who loves the man more. She can pamper him with his favorite pastries, buy him his favorite perfume. She will try by hook or by crook to prove that she is better than her daughter-in-law.
In this case, you need to always be one step ahead of your mother-in-law. Anticipate her actions, but you need to act correctly. You shouldn’t get ahead of her with a better gift or a delicious cooked dish. On the contrary, you need to show interest in where she bought it, how it is prepared, maybe she needs help, or together prepare a surprise for her husband.
Different views on raising children
Quarrels can also arise due to different views on raising children. A grandmother can either pamper the baby or be too strict with him. Raise him according to the same principles that he raised his son.
In order for the mother-in-law to love her daughter-in-law like a daughter, she must be allowed to take part in raising the children. There is no need to make scandals that children are completely different now and her methods are outdated. On the contrary, ask her for advice or gently make it clear what she is doing wrong. For example, a grandmother wraps her baby up tightly for a walk in warm autumn weather. There is no need to remove everything unnecessary with shouts. It is better, when going outside, to persuade her to dress as warmly as she wrapped the child. Having already felt on the street that she was hot, and therefore the child, she would agree that her daughter-in-law was right.
The harmful nature of the mother-in-law
The cause of disagreements is often simply the bad and harmful character of the mother-in-law. If she didn’t like her daughter-in-law and followed the principle (she wants to survive the girl from the family), then she will try to achieve her goal by any means.
Here again there will be only one way out - to go as far as possible from such a mother-in-law and see her on holidays, and then only if she does not try to spoil them. Since it is almost impossible to change an adult.
Mother-in-law considers her husband a child
Mothers-in-law often treat their sons like little children; in their eyes, they will never grow up. Therefore, the daughter-in-law is often seen by the mother as an obstacle. She is afraid that the girl might offend her child and hurt him. Poorly fed or not treated during illness.
You can find and even make friends with such a mother-in-law. Since one man is dear to both women, although they love him with different loves. When her son is sick, she needs to ask her for advice, ask her to help look after him. Or when her son is very tired at work, ask for help organizing a quiet rest in nature.
Another daughter-in-law
The mother-in-law has already found a daughter-in-law for her son. And he doesn’t want to see another girl in her place. She can specifically point out her wife’s shortcomings in front of her son and say that the girl she introduced him to would not have allowed this. And do this on any appropriate occasion.
Here you can try to please your mother-in-law, trying to correct your shortcomings. But we must remember that the girl did not marry his mother. And maybe it was her shortcomings that attracted her husband (according to her mother-in-law), and having eradicated them, she might become uninteresting to him. The best way out is patience; you just need to ignore the comments. Over time, the mother-in-law will calm down and accept the girl. And grandchildren will only speed up the process of reconciliation.
Resentment towards your mother-in-law
The reason for the mother-in-law’s hostility towards her daughter-in-law may also be the fact that she herself was poorly received by her husband’s mother in her youth and was offended in every possible way. She may simply be throwing out all the resentment that has accumulated over the years. Or maybe she just decided to take over her daughter-in-law in the same way as her mother-in-law did.
Everything is simple here, you need to remind your mother-in-law of her youth. So that she can now take the place of her daughter-in-law. Perhaps she will then not make the mistakes that her husband’s mother made. Usually with such women it is not difficult to find common language. And remembering all the grievances over a cup of tea, she will not allow everything to happen again.
Age difference
It also happens that there is a big age difference between her son and her chosen one (in either direction). How to improve relations between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in this case? If the daughter-in-law is younger, then she is likely to leave her son because young man or will change. If a girl is older than her son, then she is also not a match. This means that there will be no grandchildren, she will soon grow old, and her son will ruin his youth while caring for her.
You can still try to convince your mother-in-law of the sincerity of your feelings at first. Showing his love for her son and respect for her. But if this does not produce results, then there is no other choice but to move further from the mother-in-law.
Husband's complaints
It often happens that mothers-in-law who do not like their daughters-in-law have, one might say, earned their dislike because of their husband’s complaints. For example, the spouses had a fight over a trifle (the woman was late at work, she just Bad mood), and the husband immediately runs to complain to his mother. Based on these complaints, the mother-in-law will build her opinion about her daughter-in-law.
The conclusion suggests itself. Of course, you can talk to your husband and make it clear that everything that happens in the family is only their problem and they need to solve it themselves. But if this does not produce results, then it is better to part with such a husband. Let him live with his ideal mother.
Immediately ideal relationships between daughter-in-law and mother-in-law are not so common. If there is no hostility, then initially there is ordinary neutrality. The mother-in-law's love still needs to be won. And if disagreements occur, then you need to use your feminine wisdom and cunning and win the favor of your mother-in-law.
The very first thing to consider when joining someone else's family: you cannot openly condemn your husband in the presence of his mother or her friends. It is better to solve all problems that arise in private without prying eyes.
Remember that a mother will always see a child in her son, even when he is well over 40. Do not relegate the mother to the background. After all, you can often judge a man only by assessing how he treats his mother. Then you can safely say whether he can offend a woman or whether behind his back you can feel like behind a stone wall.
You should definitely listen to your mother-in-law’s advice, even if they are not useful in life or you decide to do things your own way, you should at least listen. Women love to be listened to, and the husband's mother is no exception.
Don’t complain to your spouse about his mother; men don’t like this, and they can unconsciously convey their daughter-in-law’s dissatisfaction to the mother-in-law. This can cause discord in relationships between women.
Sometimes women quarrel because they have no children. If the mother-in-law does not love her daughter-in-law, then the girl, of course, consciously does not give birth to grandchildren or does not allow them to see their grandmother. This is a kind of protest and it is grandchildren who most often bring women together. Grandmothers sit with them when a woman needs to go away. And mothers-in-law simply love to pamper their children, especially since the blood of her beloved son flows in them, and therefore hers.
Rules for approaching
Important Rules that will help you get closer to your mother-in-law:
- show your husband’s mother that she is respected and her opinion is valued;
- avoid quarrels with mother-in-law;
- do not tell your husband what you don’t like about his mother, and do not describe what irritates you about her;
- in the presence of your husband, ask his mother for advice, this will strengthen the love of the husband and his mother, here it is important not to go too far, make requests infrequently and to the point;
- do not discuss your mother-in-law among people who can pass everything on to her or her son;
- find a middle ground in communication: no longer a friend, but not yet a close relative;
- live separately from mother-in-law.
So why don't mothers-in-law like their daughters-in-law? In reviews, people write that often these are two women with the same characters (both owners). Or the young girl simply does not yet know how to build the right relationship with her new relative. The above rules will help to avoid disagreements.
How can you understand that the mother-in-law does not love her daughter-in-law, even without even knowing her? In this case, a horoscope comes to the rescue. You should find out who your future relative is by zodiac sign. Date of birth can tell a lot about a person. And knowing the exemplary character of the second mother, you can be prepared for surprises in her behavior.
- Aries. These are women with a difficult character. They are too emotional. And in a fit of anger they can say unnecessary things. They fight for the love of their child. And if she hears something bad about her son from the lips of her daughter-in-law, then war will be declared for life. Her weakness: women love sleep and peace.
- Taurus. They can be called the ideal option for mother-in-law. They are quite patient and rarely show their feelings. And if the husband commits a crime, the mother-in-law will help correct the situation and save the family. It is easy to find an approach to it. Respect her, love her son and listen to advice.
- Twins. This type of women can be called natural-born mothers-in-law. They love communication and work very much. Although they like to pretend to be serious women. By learning to listen to your mother-in-law and giving her the opportunity to cry into her vest, you can win her trust forever.
- Cancers. These are owners and practical people. Daughters-in-law are rarely treated with hostility; they see them as free maids who will watch over her son. And besides, they give birth to grandchildren, whom they love to the point of oblivion. This is their weak point.
- Lions. These are kind of queens. They love to be obeyed. If you show your mother-in-law your respect and have intimate conversations more often, then you can become good friends with her. And if she is also the first to know about the imminent appearance of a grandson or granddaughter, then her heart will be won. But this type of woman cannot tolerate criticism. Therefore, it is better not to make such mistakes.
- Virgos. These are most often boring and touchy women, with their own quirks. But it’s easy to find a common language with them. You need to be patient so as not to pay attention to their antics. They love to be praised, but do not accept help. They love cleanliness in the house. So, to avoid conflicts, you need to keep your apartment in order.
- Scales. They easily accept their daughters-in-law and can even adapt to their quirks. But this type of woman is insidious in that she takes all the dirt out of the hut. Therefore, you should not have too frank conversations with her.
- Scorpios. The most dangerous type of mother-in-law. Can humiliate and offend in the presence of strangers and her husband. He won't let his son out from under his wing. It is better to avoid such mothers-in-law or live further away from them.
- Sagittarius. Not a bad option for a mother-in-law. She is most often self-sufficient and loves work. He will accept his daughter-in-law if he sees her love for her son and the prosperity in the family. But he won't tolerate it cohabitation with my daughter-in-law.
- Capricorns. They can help a young family on their own, but financial help cannot be expected from them. If necessary, he will always help with practical advice. You can trust her, the information received will not leave the walls of the house. If a quarrel arises, she will not be the first to reconcile. Usually he doesn’t interfere with his son’s family life, although he loves him very much.
- Aquarius. In order to avoid quarrels with your mother-in-law, you need to have a lot of patience. Their opinions often change and they like to teach wisely. These are excellent grandmothers, and with the help of their grandchildren you can find an approach to them.
- Fish. Why don't they like Pisces mother-in-laws? These ladies can sense people a mile away and are difficult to deceive. But if a woman likes a girl, then there will be an idyll in the family. She will not interfere in the family life of the young. And she will be the most best grandma, which will not spoil the grandchildren too much, but the necessary and useful information will be given to them in doses.
Conclusion
Sometimes it’s not difficult to understand that a mother-in-law doesn’t love her daughter-in-law. Although some zodiac signs may not show this in person. But they will not be able to hide their hostility. If the girl is well prepared for the future family life, and she will study the psychology of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, then, most likely, she will be able to find an approach even to the most “fierce” mother-in-law. The most important thing is to live separately, even an ideal relationship can collapse if the mother-in-law lives with a young couple together.
The relationship between the daughter-in-law and her husband's relatives in most cases is problematic. There can be many reasons:
- expectations did not match;
- different understanding of everyday life;
- character traits;
- discrepancy in life values, upbringing and level of culture.
No matter how you change modern world, but in many families of Eastern peoples, customs and traditions continue to remain a part of life.
- “The youngest (or only) son should live with his parents.”
- “The daughter-in-law is obliged to take full responsibility for running the household and fulfill all the requirements placed on her.”
- “The daughter-in-law becomes part of the family and must distance herself from her parents.”
This article is mostly devoted to issues of disagreement that arise between a daughter-in-law and sister-in-law(s).
Let's look at typical examples.
1. A 25-year-old girl came for consultation. At this stage of her life she lives with her parents. A couple of years ago, her older brother got married and a daughter-in-law joined their family. Excerpt from the conversation:
My brother's wife annoys me. He sleeps for a long time. The bed may not be made all day. She is not accustomed to cleanliness and is superficial about cleaning. My parents are silent and say that there is no need to quarrel. You have to be patient. But I can't remain silent! That's why I fight with her all the time!
What are your plans?
Help her parents re-educate her and “put her in her place.”
What are your plans for your life?
I'm working now. I hope to get married soon.
Please note: speaking about her plans, the girl put the re-education of her daughter-in-law first, not realizing that this was a thankless task, and most importantly, not hers.
In the course of our work, first of all, we set priorities and focused attention on her development as an individual, and also touched upon the topic of the female position in relationships with the opposite sex. The girl realized that she was not fixated on her topic.
We have worked out a new tactic for building relationships with our daughter-in-law, which excludes raising the tone and provides for an agreement.
The girl had questions:
- “Why don’t my parents tell her anything?”
The girl’s parents are wise people who understand the customs of their people. Their daughter will go to another family, and they will live with their son’s family throughout their old age. Why would they take destructive steps in this relationship? - “What if my brother becomes henpecked?”
Whether her brother becomes henpecked or not depends solely on what kind of relationship he builds with his wife. He is not a defenseless child who needs to be looked after. His life is his choice. - “What if she can turn my nephew against me?”
How a girl pays attention and expresses love to her nephew largely determines his attitude towards his aunt.
When the questions were exhausted and sorted out, the girl said: “On the one hand, I understand her: the child is small, she is constantly in her arms, she doesn’t get enough sleep...”. Having seen the situation more broadly, there was also an understanding of the other person’s condition.
2. This example associated with the conversion of a girl who married a man living with her parents and two older sisters.
The context of the situation makes it clear that in addition to the parents, there are two adult women in the house who currently do not have their own family life. One of them is divorced and has a daughter, the other was not married.
Excerpt from the girl’s monologue:
“I hate these two old maids! I knew from the beginning that it would be difficult with them, and I decided to immediately show my character and not let myself be offended!”
As is clear from the statement, her belligerent attitude created hostility in the relationship. Although it would be more prudent to ask yourself the question before getting married: “Am I ready to become part of this family?” Next, realize that the choice to marry a man who lives with a large number of relatives is her own.
A detailed analysis of the current situation in the family revealed the reasons why the husband’s sisters harbored a grudge against their daughter-in-law.
- The girl came home from work, locked herself in the bedroom and did not come down for dinner, explaining that she was tired and had no appetite. In fact, she didn’t want to look after everyone, serve tea and wash dishes.
- She reacted sharply to her sisters-in-law’s requests to participate in some household chores and usually answered: “I can’t now, I’ll do it later.”
Coming to her husband’s family, every girl should realize that the way of life of these people has been formed over years, decades, and it is important to learn to get along with their certain rhythm. Having gained trust in the family and the affection of relatives, you can gradually make your own changes.
If all the steps taken to establish harmonious relationships do not bring results, of course, you cannot remain in the position of a victim. In this case, you need to look for ways to change the situation together with your spouse.
Main rule:
exclude insults and negative emotional statements towards the husband’s relatives. Be guided by facts and strive for constructive conversation.
Most quarrels and conflicts occur precisely because some people strive to be true to their principles, while others try to impose their views. In fact, all those who welcome new people into life need to clearly understand that life dimensions and priorities rarely coincide in any cases.
The ability to maintain your own boundaries without destroying others is an important component in a relationship.
Happy birthday to you,
My dear daughter-in-law,
And in this life I wish you,
So that there is no sadness for a day.
So that my brother loves you very much,
He protected me from adversity and problems.
Dressed superbly and stylishly
And he cared and did not offend.
So that dreams certainly come true,
And sometimes even with interest.
And may we remain forever
In a good relationship with you!
You are the kind of wife you need,
I'm very happy for my brother
I wish you everything in the world
The best woman on the planet:
Laughter, joy and passion,
Women's health, happiness,
May your home be cozy
Everything will be in abundance in it,
The husband is faithful, the children are obedient,
Beauty is always in bloom!
My dear, happy birthday to you! My brother is extremely lucky with his wife, although you are like me sister! Be loved, desired, charming and beautiful every day of your life!
Happy birthday, daughter-in-law. I wish you a sweet family life and great luck in whatever path you take. May all your plans be successfully implemented, may all your good hopes be certainly justified, may all your dreams come true soon. I wish you and your loved ones health and peace. Be happy and always look good!
Happy birthday, dear!
You've been like a sister to me for a long time.
My brother was lucky with his wife:
You are beautiful and kind.
I wish to live happily
Protect the purity of the soul.
So that we find more often
It's time for warm meetings.
Lucky brother
With a sweet, glorious wife.
Happy birthday dear
Just stay like this.
I wish you women's happiness,
Never lose heart.
What a naughty brother
Always keep it in your fist.
Dear sister-in-law, accept your husband from your sister sincere congratulations. On your birthday, I would like to wish you great happiness and true good luck, eternal love and beauty, peace in the family and understanding, joy in life and great success, great mood and good health.
Congratulations from sister-in-law
You, daughter-in-law, accept
And a glass of champagne soon
Fill it up on your birthday.
Like champagne let life
Yours will be easy
Let my brother feel sorry for you,
Protects and loves.
I wish that the hearth
You took care of the family
The happiest in the world,
May your family be there.
Dear daughter-in-law, happy birthday to you. I wish you to live in a world of bright colors, beautiful dreams, happy moments, interesting events and great aspirations. May there always be prosperity in the family, may love live forever in the heart.
I am always happy to say to everyone:
You make your brother happy!
I will open the world of wishes,
To congratulate his wife:
I wish you happiness in your personal life
(So that everything is fine with my brother),
I wish you an ocean of health
(This way my brother will be calmer)
Good luck, and a lot of money
(That’s it, my brother will definitely live without grief)!
And if it’s simple and without jokes -
Be happy without jokes!
Many here write about how bad sisters-in-law are, [edited by moderator fenechek], sister-in-law from the word "evil", snake head, etc.
I'm a sister-in-law. My brother is younger than me and so is my sister-in-law. We communicated little, because we live in different cities. But we saw each other once every six months, once a year. I don’t talk to my brother often, but regularly. Our children are the same age.
And then, as they say, thunder struck... A couple of days ago, my daughter-in-law and I corresponded on the Internet. I agree, I'm not an angel. As I analyze this situation, I understand that I should have just remained silent, or delayed my answer, but I couldn’t restrain myself and didn’t remain silent. My mother probably also played her role, I’m telling you how her daughter-in-law shits and curses at her.
In general, I wrote her a not very impartial answer (without swearing), asking why she wants to ruin relations with her family?... and then she burst out: what have I not read about myself and my entire family. She seemed to have forgotten where her husband came from.
Here are some examples of her statements:
“You’re talking about ruining your relationship with your relatives, which one???
You and your man sort it out, but we’ll manage without you!!!
Well, just try, look at yourself, 30 years old, children and not married, I’m telling you, don’t teach me, but I’ll be more literate than you...
I’m not going to measure here [edited by moderator fenechek]
you're acting like a teenager!!!
she made a career ha what a joke??? maternity leave???
What kind of relatives are we talking about? You and your mother are no one for me to call you!!!"
True, I also called her “green snot,” and what she considers her greatest achievement is the stamp in her marriage passport.
In general, I didn’t answer her anymore - but she kept sending and sending me her messages.
Her brother didn’t react to this in any way; he was apparently firmly under her thumb.
Okay, I'm just his sister, but how can he stand it when she trashes his mother? On the phone yelling at mom if his wife is nearby?
My husband told me that there was no need to talk to her at all or to immediately send her somewhere, he was right.
If I had known that it would turn out this way, the man showed his nature.
In general, it’s disgusting at heart. The brother is generally silent, he can’t even blather anything in response.
She wrote that we don’t help them, but her relatives help (I haven’t seen her relatives in person, only once at a wedding). My mother sits with their children all the time while they hang out in clubs. She borrows money from them, borrows it, and doesn’t give it to them, because she works part-time and her pension is small, her father died a long time ago, and her daughter-in-law spent two months at work in her life, and she has no idea what it’s like to earn money afterwards.
Of course, I don’t help them with money (and why would they?), but they did give me potatoes from the dacha.
In general, I have such confusion in my head; no one has ever poured so much crap on me in my entire life.
I don’t even know.. how to forgive in this situation?, to score?
