One cooks well, another draws, the third knows how to lead effectively, the fourth runs fast, the fifth speaks well in public... Every person, without exception, has abilities. These are personal qualities inherent only to this particular person, which make him unique and provide advantages in certain types of activities. But these qualities are not always obvious. It happens that a person simply does not notice his strengths and tries to develop his weaknesses - he goes in a direction that will not lead him to high results. Understanding your abilities is already a big step towards self-realization and success. The question is - how to find out your abilities?
Why is it so important to understand your abilities?
“Failure to understand one’s strengths leads to depression,” says Pavel Kochkin, author of the “Destination” project. The mechanism is very simple and is as follows: a person does not accept or does not see his strengths and his abilities, instead he focuses on the development of weaknesses. For example, having no ability for public speaking, he chooses a job that involves constant communication and works on his public speaking and effective communication skills every day. You must understand that no matter what efforts he makes in this case, he will still not grow up to his ideal, and as a result, he will always be dissatisfied with himself. This is where depression arises.
Using abilities, a person increases his efficiency many times and achieves high results, which leads to increased self-esteem. And the person who values, loves and respects himself is even more effective.
How to find out your abilities?
Nobody knows you better than you know yourself. Therefore, you must answer the question “what am I capable of” yourself. Pavel Kochkin gives some valuable advice on how to understand your abilities and apply them in life:
1. Get to know yourself. Ask yourself: what am I best at? What makes me different from others? What achievements do I have, and how did I get them? Ask yourself the question “what am I good at” more than once. Let this question always be in your head. Evaluate your results and the means that helped you achieve them.
2. Recognize your strengths. Don't try to run away from yourself. Even if you think that one or another of your abilities is useless, do not reject it. There are a million options in the world on how to correctly implement this ability.
3.
Accept yourself as you are and give yourself to the world that way. “Believe me, you are in demand for who you truly are in spirit and essence,” says Pavel.
Your abilities are the key to unlocking your potential, achieving outstanding results and success in life.
Pavel Kochkin advises: “Stop doing what is not your strength, what you do not have the ability to do.” Understanding your abilities gives you a huge advantage - you become effective in your activities and achieve maximum results.
We all have our own strengths and traits that make up our unique personality. From a sense of humor and the ability to be a great listener to the ability to be a loyal friend, we all have qualities that make us who we are, and some of these qualities will be more pronounced than others. And, by the way, your zodiac sign also influences this. So, what does each of them do best?
1. Aries
Aries is assertive. He was born to be a leader and has no problem taking responsibility when necessary. This sign is the absolute boss of everything (both at work and in any everyday situation), and he really knows how to get what he wants. Aries is a motivated person, and he will never be satisfied with the minimum.
2. Taurus
Taurus is incredibly real. This means that all his words and actions are sincere and genuine. He is not at all afraid to openly be himself and will never lie in anything he says or does. This sign does not wear a mask to impress others and does not know how to hide anything.
3. Gemini
Geminis have a great sense of humor. He sees the funny side and humor in almost everything and just wants and loves to have fun. This sign is a source of jokes and anecdotes that literally flow from it like a fountain, and its infectious laughter turns on any audience.
4. Cancer
Cancer knows how to be faithful. He becomes firmly attached to people dear to him, as if becoming an integral part of them. Cancer values all of his relationships highly and never betrays the trust of others. This sign sticks to its own principles and its loyalty is unwavering.
5. Leo
Leo has the most generous heart. When he sees people in need, he will not hesitate for a second and will immediately lend a helping hand. Leo is caring, knows how to give compliments and appreciate other people, especially those who are especially to his liking.
6. Virgo
Virgo does best with minimalism and living a simple life. She has no need for excesses and luxury; she surrounds herself with only the most necessary things and cannot tolerate waste. She doesn't ask for much and is happy with what she already has.
7. Libra
Libras are incredibly peaceful. They hate starting arguments or causing conflicts. They just like to maintain peace and harmony. This sign masterfully knows how to calm people down and resolve any contradictions. They always try to compromise and agree with others in order to maintain peace.
8. Scorpio
Scorpio can suffocate with his love. He has so much of this feeling that he just doesn’t want to hold back. This sign does not dwell on the negative and prefers to completely surrender to its passions. He is very caring towards a select group of close people and values these relationships.
9. Sagittarius
Sagittarius knows better than anyone how to have fun. He likes to relax and have fun to the fullest. Sagittarius loves to be wild and free and is always ready to experiment with something new and unknown. This sign is not afraid to enjoy and get a lot of pleasure from everything.
10. Capricorn
Capricorn knows how to bear responsibility better than anyone else. He always fulfills his obligations and never relaxes. Sometimes it seems that this sign has already been born into a mature adult. He is overly reliable and pays all his bills on time.
11. Aquarius
Aquarius is best at being a rebel and rebel, which is why he never fits into norms and standards. This is a progressive and individualistic sign, stubbornly following its own path. Aquarius is not afraid to voice what's on his mind, even if it goes against popular opinion.
12. Pisces
Pisces are overly caring, very attentive and sensitive to their loved ones, to the point that this sign will sacrifice itself to them without hesitation. Pisces are distinguished by special empathy, responsiveness, sensitivity and compassion like no other.
“My favorite job wakes you up early,
and we are happy to take on it"
William Shakespeare
In the previous one, you and I have already compiled lists of our interests, desires, hobbies, etc., now we can begin to analyze them in detail. So, you can reveal your talents in the following way:
- Draw a table with three columns:
- “What am I best at doing?”
- "what I like to do"
- “the best of what you like.”
- To the first column rewrite the list of answers to the questions posed in the previous article about what you do easily, and also put here what you think gives positive results that you can note.
- In the second column take out what you really enjoy from the first column - what exactly you like to do. You can add other abilities that you have to the list.
- To the third column It is necessary to make those points that are in both the first and second. As a rule, life's work is that it brings pleasure and is easy to achieve.
Having made a list of what you like and are good at, you should ask a new question: will you do something that will not generate income, so to speak, for the soul. Find the answer in your list in the third column. This way you will answer the question, how to find your favorite thing. It's in front of you!
Only by doing what you love can you become a true master
"The exceptional happiness of man is
to be in your constant favorite business"
Nemirovich-Danchenko
And if what turns out well, you don’t like and don’t give pleasure
Yes, it also happens that the lists from the first and second columns do not intersect at all. This happens because a person receives an education as expected, works his entire adult life in an area in which he has certain knowledge, but it does not bring pleasure. How to find your life's work in this case? Is it necessary, you might ask?
As a rule, in the case when you are able to do something easily, you have enough knowledge and skills, but this activity does not give you pleasure and, accordingly, does not inspire you, the results do not bring joy, you still get used to constancy. Stability, habit - this is what keeps most of us at the same level. We know that in life everything goes on as usual: work-salary-home-vacation to the sea-formed circle of friends and further on as usual. Everything is like everyone else, right? Each of us is afraid of losing this stability, even though there is little real joy in it.
Psychologists call this condition. A zone within which we live calmly and confidently, but is it happy? Many will ask, what's wrong with stability and calm? In general, nothing. But a person who is constantly in his comfort zone remains at the same level of development, does not achieve new goals, does not develop as a person, does not understand what real success and real happiness are...
But, if you are reading this article, you have already realized that the time has come to change something - to find your life’s work, understand its meaning, reveal your talents and achieve success. If you have already compiled the table described above, but could not find the points that intersect in the first and second columns, then it’s time to get out of your comfort zone in order to look at your life differently.
Doing what you love is everyone's dream. But there is one problem: what we really like is not always what we are good at. But this does not mean that your dream is over! You just need to figure out how to get closer to its implementation using the skills that you already have. Of course, the dream can be corrected. Four questions that will help with all this were brought up by Whitney Johnson, author of the book Disrupt Yourself: Putting the Power of Disruptive Innovation to Work and columnist for The Daily Muse project.
1. What skills have helped you succeed at something?
During your childhood and student years, you probably developed some skills. Successful consultant Scott Edinger grew up in a poor family, and at the age of nine he was adopted by another family under not the most pleasant circumstances. Edinger learned to survive by becoming an expert in communication, conflict resolution, understanding and persuasion.
At university, he polished his communication skills, placing in the top five in the 100 varsity debates and earning a degree in communications and rhetoric. After a while, he became the number two salesman at one of the largest American companies, and then helped organizations reform underperforming departments and focus on the key skill for business survival - how to sell products.
Not everyone was as unlucky in their childhood as Edinger. But all the same, you also encountered some obstacles in life - and came up with a way to get around them. Think about situations that have challenged you: do they have anything in common? If yes, then it's something you're good at. So think about what area or position this skill would be useful for.
2. What makes you feel stronger?
Marcus Buckingham, author of Achieve Your Maximum, explains: “Our strengths attract attention in the most basic way: when you use them, you feel stronger. Notice the moments when you feel refreshed, curious, and successful. This is a clue as to what exactly your strengths are.”
Also think about what activities you take on when you feel overwhelmed. In such cases, we want to feel in control. And to do this you need to do what makes you feel stronger. If you decide on these activities and skills, you will also increase your level of happiness, which helps you better solve a wide variety of problems.
3. What made you special as a child?
As children, we only do what we like, even if we look weird doing it. Looking back on these activities now, you may well discover some innate talent. Candace Brown Elliott's classmates teased her as "Encyclopedia Brown" (that was the character's nickname in one book). She recalls: "All the kids thought I was the smartest one in school, but most of the teachers were disappointed because I mostly got C's. They thought I was lagging behind.” Meanwhile, she dreamed of lively conversations with celebrities like Marie Curie, about how she would develop a real artificial intelligence that would sit in her closet. She dreamed of floating cities, great inventions and new forms of art.
Forty years have passed, and Elliott has 90 patents. Its most famous invention, PenTile, a color LCD screen architecture, powers hundreds of millions of smartphones, tablets, laptops and TVs. She founded her own company to develop this technology and later sold it to Samsung. All of Elliot's childhood dreams were considered weird by her classmates, and the teachers were simply annoyed by them. But as an adult, this tendency to daydream became her superpower.
Did you have anything special as a child? Could this be your superpower?
4. What compliments do you ignore?
Too often we don't notice our strengths. When you do something well on a reflective level, it doesn't stand out. Therefore, listen carefully to compliments that you usually brush aside or ignore because this skill seems banal and natural to you. Perhaps you hear some compliments so often that you are already sick of them! Why can't people praise you for something you worked really, really hard on and tried so hard to do well?
This tendency to brush off compliments is understandable, but the result is that you end up selling your real value at a steep discount. Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote: “In every work of genius we find our own rejected thoughts; they return to us with a certain aloof grandeur.” Don't assume that just because something comes easy to you or seems obvious, that it can't be a rare and valuable skill for other people.
Do you sometimes hear such compliments? What superpowers are not included in your resume?
This way you can identify your obvious strengths - what others don't do as well as you. Find problems that you are particularly passionate about and apply those strongest skills to them.
I believe that we all came into this world for a reason and that we all have some significance in it. I truly believe that we are all gifted with unique and unique talents. The realization of our talents is much more important than we ourselves realize.
First, I'll tell you my story.
Last year I was overwhelmed by the number of things to do because I was chasing my dream of money and “success”. I didn’t even remember why I needed it. Luckily for me, I met Jim (not his real name). Jim achieved the monetary success I so desired. He was financially independent, he successfully ran several projects, he had real estate in many countries, he could afford all the luxuries that money could buy.
He was able to achieve all this through hard work, consistency and responsibility! But Jim was not happy. He had no free time to enjoy his wealth. He wanted to have a family. He wanted peace. He wanted to live his own life... but he couldn't afford it. He had too many responsibilities, without fulfilling which he would have lost a lot. He had a lot to protect. Jim spent years building his castle and now that the construction is complete, he spends all his time ensuring that the castle does not collapse under the influence of external factors.
Meeting Jim opened my eyes to my life and forced me to change it. His words brought me to my senses. It suddenly became clear to me that “I don’t want to spend the next 10 years of my life chasing money, only to then find my emotional, mental and spiritual development at the same level as it was at the beginning of the chase.” Brakes squealed as my pursuit stalled and then was put aside. I spent the next two months re-evaluating my life goals.
The following questions came to my mind: What am I chasing? Why am I doing this? What is my true purpose? Why am I here?
While reading Michael Gerber's book E-Myth: Why Most Small Businesses Don't Work, I found myself crying. In that chapter, the author asked readers to complete visualization exercises. Following his instructions, you clearly picture the day of your funeral in your mind. What kind of eulogy do you want for yourself? What will be your lifetime achievements? What will matter most to you at the end of your life? Is this what you are doing now?
I started writing. I started making a list of what is really important to me. I wrote down everything I wanted to do. I reconsidered my priorities. For myself, I decided that all the steps I took should lead to achieving a goal that aligns with my personal values and is what I really want from life. With each new opportunity, I must determine whether this opportunity is suitable for achieving my ultimate goal. No matter how much money a new opportunity brings me, if it goes against my life goals, I won't take it. I formulated my goal as follows:
To inspire, encourage and motivate people to live happier, more meaningful lives.
Here are some tasks that are particularly significant to me:
- For me, agreement with myself, self-realization and a feeling of happiness are of great importance;
- The greatest value for me is serious relationships with people, the ability to build real relationships at a deep level;
- I will be financially independent and manage my time and location. I want to work only on those projects and implement only those ideas that I like. My financial situation will not conflict with my values and life goals;
- I will travel and live in different parts of the world. Having become acquainted with all kinds of cultures, I will document them in photographs and share my impressions with others;
- I'll buy my mom a house in Vancouver with a pool in the backyard. This is her dream and I want to make it come true;
- Family is important to me. I want my husband and I to have a strong and loving relationship.
- I try to live every day as fully as if it were my last day.
15 questions to help you understand your life goals.
Listing these questions can help you discover your life goals. They are designed to help you mentally formulate the tasks you need to accomplish throughout your life.
Simple instructions:
- Take several sheets of writing paper;
- Find a place where no one will disturb you. Turn off your mobile phone;
- Write down the answers to all questions. Write down the first thing that comes to mind. Write without making any edits. Answer all questions. It is more important to write down all the answers rather than just think about them;
- Write quickly. Give yourself no more than 60 seconds for each question. It’s better if it takes you less than 30 seconds;
- Be honest. Nobody will read this. It is very important to write without making changes;
- Enjoy what you are doing and smile while you do it.
15 questions:
- What makes you smile? (Occupation, people, events, hobbies, projects, etc.)
- What have you enjoyed doing in the past? What do you like to do now?
- When doing what kind of work can you lose track of time?
- What makes you proud of yourself?
- Who is your biggest inspiration? (Anyone you know or don't know personally. Members of your family, friends, writers, artists, political figures, etc.). What qualities do each of your inspirations serve as an example to you?
- What are you particularly good at? (Your skills, abilities and talents).
- What kind of help do people usually turn to you for?
- If you had to teach someone something, what would you teach?
- What would you regret in your life? (Imperfect actions, lack of something).
- Imagine that you are already 90 years old. You are sitting in a rocking chair on the porch of your house and basking in the gentle rays of spring. You are happy and relaxed, you are content with the wonderful life that has been given to you. You remember your whole life, think about what you achieved during this life and what you had. You go over all the relationships in your memory. What matters most to you? Make a list.
- What are your true values? Choose 3-6 words in descending order of importance.
- What challenges, struggles and adversities have you had to overcome or are you currently facing? How do you do it?
- What ideas do you truly believe in? What attracts you to them?
- If you had to speak in front of a large number of people, what would your speech be about? Who would these people be?
- You have talents, preferences and values. How could you use what you have been given to serve, help, and make a personal contribution? (People, living beings, ideas, organizations, environment, world, etc.).
| What are your highest values? | ||
| Achievements | Friendship | Quality of work |
| Adventures | Helpfulness | Personal growth |
| Beauty | Health | Game |
| Be the best | Honesty | Productivity |
| Challenge | Independence | Initiative |
| Convenience | Inner peace | Relationship |
| Courage | Directness | Reliability |
| Creation | Intelligence | Respect |
| Curiosity | Close relationships | Safety |
| Education | Fun | Spirituality |
| Trust | Leadership | Success |
| Environment | Studies | Freedom in time |
| Family | Love | Diversity |
| Financial independence | Interest | |
| Healthy lifestyle | Passion | |
| Other values not listed | ||
Your purpose in this world
“You change when you write down your goals and review them because it requires you to think carefully, deeply about what is really important to you and adjust your behavior to your beliefs.”- Stephen Covey "7 Habits of Highly Effective People"
You can understand your purpose by answering 3 questions:
- What do I want to do?
- Who do I want to help?
- What will be the result? What will I create?
Steps to determining your purpose:
- Answer the 15 questions above at a fast pace.
- List words that describe you. For example: education, achieving excellence, trust, inspiration, improvement, help, giving, guidance, inspiration, possession, motivation, education, organization, promotion, journey, growth, participation, satisfaction, understanding, teaching, creativity, etc.
- Based on your 15 answers, list everything and everyone you can help. For example: people, living beings, organizations, ideas, groups, environment, etc.
- Determine your end goal. How will those in the answer to the question above benefit from what you do?
- State steps 2-4 in one or 2-3 sentences.
What is your goal? What is your purpose? What are your aspirations? Share your thoughts in the comments to the article.
