Perhaps after reading this book the doors of the largest companies in the world will not open to you. But we guarantee that from now on you will not have any omissions or misunderstandings with your subordinates, colleagues and boss, and your spouse and children will no longer angrily slam the door in your face after another loud quarrel.
And do you know why? You will learn not just to convince people, but to hear them and understand their fears and aspirations!
It is this skill (the ability to listen and hear) that, according to Mark Goulston, lies at the heart of successful negotiations. And he knows exactly what he’s talking about, because he has serious scientific and practical work in the field of psychiatry, as well as training FBI negotiators and top managers of companies such as IBM, Bloomberg, Federal Express and Accenture.
This is an excellent book for businessmen who need to negotiate and manage their employees every day. For their children, who need to find a common language with their parents every evening. For everyone who wants to be heard and understood and is ready to hear and understand another.
- Name: I can hear you right through. Effective Negotiation Techniques
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- ISBN: 978-5-91657-124-0
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Advantages
1. The techniques presented are psychologically very deep, taken from the practices of psychotherapists, coaches, and negotiators. They really work.
2. These techniques are described in very understandable language for people who do not have a psychological education and do not delve into other people's brains. A sufficient number of use cases, real phrases, and life stories help make the first steps in using the book very simple.
3. There is a lot of positivity in the book, after which you become confident that there are almost no inconvenient, problematic people - you just need to understand the motives of those around you.
4. The book is written interestingly, there is no boredom. I want to read it to the end.
Flaws:
The book is more about establishing contact and establishing good relationships than about negotiations. Negotiation is not about good relationships and empathy.
Finding a definition for the emotions you feel at each stage of a crisis is quite simple, and is part of the solution; but this is only the first step. That is why those who during a crisis limit themselves to shouting “damn it!” do not make any progress towards resolving it.
Therefore, once you find the right names for your emotions and thereby find a foothold for the human layer of the brain, you must begin a gradual ascent from panic to control. Here's how to do it:
Exercise “damn it” - “agree”
“Holy shit!” (reaction phase). Don't deny that you are upset or scared. Instead, identify and acknowledge your feelings, calling each by its proper name. If you are alone, say them out loud, as the physical act of exhaling will additionally help you calm down.
If you have the opportunity to leave for one or two minutes, be sure to do so. If this is not possible, under no circumstances talk to anyone during the first seconds. You need to be completely focused on acknowledging and identifying your feelings. If you have the opportunity to close your eyes for at least a minute, do so.
"My God!" (unblocking phase). Once you acknowledge your powerful emotions, begin to breathe slowly and deeply through your nose, closing your eyes, until the emotions subside. Once you have released your emotions, continue to breathe and relax. This will allow you to begin to restore your inner balance.
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City of publication: Moscow
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ISBN: 978-5-91657-334-3
Size: 411 KB
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Business book description:
We constantly need something from others, be it colleagues and clients, bosses and subordinates, children and spouses. Often something important—a career, for example—depends on whether we are able to obtain this. Or at least a vacation spent according to our wishes. Therefore, every day we convince someone of something, and not always successfully. The key to effective negotiations is the ability to listen and hear your interlocutor and the ability to understand what he expects from you. This idea, in general, is not new, but there are still very few sensible methods.
The author of this book is a scientist and an experienced negotiation practitioner rolled into one. Mark Goulston, a practicing psychiatrist and FBI negotiator trainer, talks about how to develop listening skills and how to apply them not only and not so much at work, but in life in general.
The book will be useful to everyone who wants to be heard and is ready to hear and understand others.
Copyright holders!
The presented fragment of the book is posted in agreement with the distributor of legal content, LitRes LLC (no more than 20% of the original text). If you believe that the posting of material violates your or someone else's rights, then.
We constantly need something from others, be it colleagues and clients, bosses and subordinates, children and spouses. Something important often depends on whether we can achieve this - a career, for example. Or at least a vacation spent according to our wishes.
And every day we convince someone of something (some even get paid for it). And not always successfully.
How, when faced with a blank wall, break through it and achieve the desired result: get an answer, persuade you to do something or not do something...? The key to successful negotiations is the ability to listen and hear your interlocutor and the ability to understand what he expects from you. This idea, in general, is not new, but there are still very few sensible methods.
This book is written by a scientist and an experienced negotiation practitioner rolled into one. Mark Goulston, a practicing psychiatrist, tells how to develop listening skills and how to apply them not only and not so much at work, but also in everyday life.
Who is this book for?
For businessmen who need to negotiate and manage their employees every day.
For their children, who need to find a common language with their parents every evening.
For everyone who wants to be heard and understood and is ready to hear and understand another.
Why we decided to publish this book
Because the topic of successful negotiations is still as relevant as ever - despite the huge number of books on negotiations. And also because...
"Trick" of the book
Mark Goulston trains the FBI's best negotiators. When such a specialist shares his experience, it’s a sin not to take advantage!
There are people in your life right now that you need to convince. If you don't succeed, it drives you crazy. Maybe it's someone at work - a subordinate, a member of your team, a client, or your boss. Maybe it's someone at home: a partner, a parent, a child, or a bitter ex.
You've tried everything - logic, persuasion, strength, pleading, anger - but every time you seem to hit a wall. You are losing your head, you are scared, or you are frustrated. And you think: “What will happen next?”
I'd like you to think of the situation as a hostage situation. Why? Because you cannot free yourself. You are captured - by resistance, fear, apathy, stubbornness, selfishness, or the needs of another person - as well as by your own inability to take effective action.
It is at this moment that I appear.
In the chapters of this book, I will provide nine basic rules and twelve quick techniques that you can use to move people through the Persuasion Cycle. Gain experience using them and you can put them together to work in any situation in your professional or personal life. These are the same concepts that I teach to FBI agents and negotiators to build empathy, reduce conflict, and "buy" a desired solution. Once you learn them, you will never have to be held hostage by fear, anger, indifference, or the hidden agendas of other people. You will have all the tools to turn any situation in your favor.
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