Take care of yourself so you can take care of others. If you are overwhelmed with emotional baggage and internal torment, you will not be able to help, support and inspire others. If you take care of yourself in time, you will have the opportunity to take care of others.
- Even if self-sacrifice seems noble to you, it is always important to behave correctly. Otherwise, feelings of resentment, bitterness and dissatisfaction may arise. It is important to find a balance between caring for others and caring for yourself.
Surround yourself with things that bring you joy. Imagine that you are a sponge, absorbing everything around you. You need to feel happiness yourself in order to then share it with others. The same goes for anger, sadness and envy. Try to balance your emotions.
- This does not mean that you need to push away loved ones when they are in a bad mood and faced with problems. At such moments, people need support, and negativity is only a temporary feature that does not define them as a person. Be kind to them and help them as much as you can so that they feel supported.
Understand that a person determines his own personal boundaries. Others must understand and respect these boundaries. If you don't assert your boundaries, people will cross them and respect you less for being weak. Love yourself if you want people to love you.
- How can others love you if you don't love yourself?
Exude confidence. If a person has low self-esteem, then people do not have the best opinion of him. If you become a confident but unselfish person, then others will be drawn to you.
Don't try to please everyone. This conclusion to the article may seem strange to you, but the point is that you can be as attractive as you like, but it’s all about your motives. If you act attractive because it is in your blood, you like to behave this way and it is your contribution to the world around you, then this is sincere behavior that deserves respect and love. If you behave in such a way as to please and receive love in return, then you only want to assert yourself, and do not express your essence. Try not to get confused about your motivations and especially don’t feel the need to assert yourself at the expense of other people. Remind yourself often that it is important to be yourself, and not try to win the love of the whole world. Love will come too, but this is not the end goal of your desire to be an attractive and kind person.
- Good deeds should be dictated by your beliefs, and not by the desire to earn approval and make many friends.
- It should be understood that even the kindest and most caring intention in the world will not please some people. Some will dislike you simply because they feel like it.
Among the many values, self-respect and respect for others take the leading positions when it comes to intangible quality of life. If you are respected at work, you have the right to demand and prove. If your opinion is not taken into account in any way, then there is no point in defending anything... First, make sure that you are respected. And this is work that requires effort and time, but believe me, it’s worth it!
There is something in everyone for which he can
To be respected and loved.
After all, we don't respect ourselves
Disrespect for others.
Vyacheslav Yashkov
1. Praise others, not yourself
Be sure to celebrate the achievements of other people around you (learn to praise and sincerely rejoice at the successes of the people around you). In pursuit of respect, do not forget to celebrate the successes and achievements of the people around you (in the company of your friends, you can report that such and such, for example, entered a university, successfully completed a difficult project, etc., emphasizing that you are personally proud of such and such). With this attitude you will make it clear that you are happy for your friend, colleague, you value him and again respect him, which will inevitably cause this person to respect you.
2. Treat others the way you would like to be treated.
Treat others the same way you would like them to treat you.
In other words, even if you were treated incorrectly, do not immediately try to take revenge. Do the opposite, personally inform the offender that he acted ugly and that, by humiliating and insulting you, he humiliated and insulted, first of all, himself.
3. Respect yourself
So, if you want to be respected and your opinion is important to others, learn, first of all, to show respect to others. We often copy the behavior and attitude towards people that we observe and experience on a day-to-day basis. Be ready to listen to the people whose respect you are trying to win, be ready to give advice, show sympathy. Let them know that their opinion is important to you.
4. Away with hypocrisy!
Don't be a two-faced person. You are unlikely to gain anyone's trust if you please everyone, telling people only what they want to hear. Be frank, if any problems arise among your friends, openly try to solve them, calling the conflicting parties to a frank conversation. People around you will certainly note frankness as a good character trait, which will also endear them to you.
5. Develop
Develop yourself in many ways (read, attend courses, seminars, trainings). This point may not seem so important to you at first glance, but in fact, people always give preference and show respect to interesting personalities, to whom, moreover, you can always ask a question and get an answer.
6. Become a leader
Showcase your leadership skills. Always take the initiative, take responsibility (for example, for organizing any events), make your proposals when everyone else is silent, offer your help.
7. Away with boasting!
To make others respect you, you don't have to tell other people what to think of you. Boasting is the most unreliable way, and it is based on desperation. Instead, start building a reputation for yourself as a person of merit.
8. Resist pressure from your environment
Even if you started smoking because your older friends said it was "cool," that doesn't mean you should do it again in the future. Change your life, your behavior and the consequences of your decisions. Say no to things you wouldn't normally do. This has a pretty strong effect on other people, they want to be at least a little as strong as you.
Remember: being independent from social and professional pressure and maintaining your integrity does not make you less courageous. In fact, it shows that you have a strong character and are worth having as a friend or employee.
9. Talk only about what you understand
When talking, stick to your subject matter. For example, if you travel a lot, then tell us about where you were last year; if you are interested in culture, then tell us about an art exhibition you visited recently. After all, the art of “being respected” is better understood when you communicate freely and behave openly, so there is no need to talk about what you do not understand.
10. Don't show off your weaknesses.
If you are not good at billiards, then there is no need to accept the challenge. Just say you're not playing well. At the same time, emphasize your strengths: say that you would be happy to play, say, football or basketball with them.
When a conflict arises
Be steadfast and confident during such situations, never lose concentration: squint your eyes and look at your opponents directly, do not blink. Clearly, confidently and calmly say what the problem is and how you think it should be resolved. Every movement you make should be measured, and if you point your finger at them, then do it as if every movement of your fingers could knock them over to the floor. The one who resolves the situation in this way will win himself a lot more additional whists compared to those who have steam coming out of their ears.
On occasion, however, it doesn’t hurt to demonstrate your rage. Only in moments like this, when everything is written on your face, take a breath and try to calm down. This will show that you can control yourself and that you have everything under control. And there is nothing more terrifying than a person who is in complete control of himself. People will know about your unpredictability and will try to avoid you.
Essentially, life is a game of struggle for influence between various members of the human race, and you must learn to play it if you yourself want to be a “master” and not a “subordinate.”
Have you ever encountered such a person who behaved badly towards you and did not consider you? How did you feel? Were you outraged? Offended?
5. Treat yourself with respect.
It's funny, but many people expect other people to respect them, but they don't respect themselves. Have you ever scolded yourself for no reason? Do you love yourself completely and unconditionally? Are you exhausting yourself with lack of sleep, poor nutrition or something similar? If you don't respect yourself, you can't expect other people to respect you. Start by treating yourself with love. And after self-love will come the love of others.
6.Behave like a professional.
This means dressing well, being well-mannered, speaking competently and following the rules of etiquette. If you don't know the rules of etiquette, you need to familiarize yourself with them. It can be helpful to attend an etiquette class, even if you have a rough idea of what they teach. When I was a student, I took several of these classes on wine tasting, table manners, first meeting behavior, and much more. I believe that they have benefited me. What is studied there is in no way higher mathematics and what is learned helps in practice when you know what can and cannot be done in a given situation.
7. Don't slander.
It doesn’t matter in what field of activity - both in professional and social communication, do not speak badly about people. By backbiting you will not earn the respect of other people. If you have any complaints about a certain person or you don’t like what he/she is doing, talk to that person. Don't say bad things about him/her behind his/her back because talking behind his/her back will lead to further gossip and innuendo. Whether you realize it or not, it will not only show the bad side of you, but it will also hurt that person. Be honest and open with the people you interact with.
8.Stand up for your beliefs.
Have you ever met people who, without thinking, easily agree with everything no matter what they are told? I have encountered such people, and in the end, their consent ceases to have any meaning. Personally, I have more respect for someone who (politely) disagrees and stands up for their position than someone who always sings along to others. Only by having your own opinion and thinking with your own head can you achieve the respect of those around you. Don't be afraid to stand up for your beliefs. At the same time, make sure that you do it politely and do not offend others.
9. Be yourself.
Continuing from point 8, be yourself. It is always better to be the original of yourself than to be an exact likeness of someone else. People respect individuals who do not try to imitate anyone. So many people try their best to be something they are not, and in the end they lose their identity. Find yourself, understand what you are. The world needs people who are themselves, not clones of each other.
10. Be an example for others.
Actions speak louder than words. Do you set an example for others with your behavior? Do you adhere to established standards of behavior? Do you gain respect by backing your words with action? A person who is respected by other people, by his personal example, pushes others to do good and right things.
What about you? Did any of the advice suggested above resonate with you? Do you have any learned methods on how to gain the respect of others? Feel free to write them in the comments to the article.
A person wants universal recognition more than money and love. This has long been a proven fact. But sometimes you have to step over your moral principles in order to achieve your cherished goal. How to force people to respect yourself and at the same time not catch the judgmental glances of those who are aware of all the ins and outs? About this in today's article.
1. Are you doing your job?
Don't waste your time worrying about what people think of you. Better take care of something that directly relates to your career advancement: finally get to work, and do your job well. Not only will this save you from mental anguish, it will help you spend your time productively.
2. Never ignore deadlines.
By showing up to meetings on time and completing your projects on time, you will earn a reputation for reliability.
3. Dress code.
They meet you by their clothes. If you don’t want any difficulties at the very beginning, then think through your wardrobe. An employee is the face of the company. You need to decorate it properly. Some companies do not have specific criteria for work clothes, so try not to be too familiar with suits, but also not to spoil the public with miniskirts. Look at your colleagues.
4. Treat everyone with respect.
To be respected, learn to respect yourself. People will be drawn to someone who can communicate with respect and treat the janitor with respect.
5. Make friends with the right people.
Try to associate with people who are similar to who you want to be. We are not talking about bosses, but about those who have earned a good reputation and whom everyone listens to. Of course, this person could be your boss, but not always.
6. Become a mediator.
Know someone at another company who can help your colleague? So share your friend's contacts. This will prove that you are not only a sociable person with impressive connections, but also ready to help.
7. Invite people.
Have you figured out how to brighten up your evening? Don't become isolated. Invite one of your colleagues who would be interested. This will help build bridges and get to know the person better.
8. Use the word “I” less.
Psychologists say that a person uses a personal pronoun when communicating with people when he considers himself superior to them. To match them, simply omit this word. Without knowing why, they will begin to treat you with more respect.
9. Ask for help.
Yes, asking for help will help you gain respect. This will show you at your best: firstly, because you are smart enough not to waste your time figuring things out on your own, and because you know that it is more productive to ask someone for help. Secondly, whoever you asked realizes that you consider him a qualified specialist and respect his opinion.
10. Help your comrades.
Have some free time? Ask your boss or colleagues if they need your help. Go to the buffet, ask “what to bring?” This way you will free them from unnecessary work, but will not punish yourself.
11. Hear and listen.
Nothing irritates people more than the moment when they are animatedly telling you something, and you are distracted by something else. When you listen to your interlocutor, really listen. Ask clarifying questions, nod to prove your understanding, take a comfortable position in which the interlocutor will understand that he is telling things that are important to you.
12. Ask about business.
With today's frantic pace of life, many people simply forget to ask about business. The simple cliché “How are you?” lifts people's spirits in an amazing way.
13. Remember the little things.
Names of children, spouses, favorite brands of wine, hobbies, plans for the future. This will make it clear that you care about the person. Bad memory? Repeat all the little things after a conversation with your friend, so there is a greater chance that they will stick in your memory. Remember only half? Don't be afraid to ask again what you forgot.
14. Be ashamed of your mistakes.
I all know that no one is perfect. This is far from a secret. If someone pretends to be a robot who never makes mistakes, then a lot of suspicion falls on him. Mistakes in themselves are not the end of the world, they just lead to negative consequences, and admitting your mistake is a feat.
15. ...but explain what you will do to correct them.
Confessing and then doing nothing is not the best policy for achieving universal recognition. Before you confess, make sure you have at least one plan in place. Better yet, come up with a few. Say them all, and then ask an authority figure to choose the most correct one if you are not sure what to do.
16. Look for reviews.
Regularly ask people what you are bad at and work on your shortcomings. They will notice that you are looking for imperfections in yourself and are ready to eliminate them. Try to arrange monthly meetings with your boss and colleagues, where they can express absolutely all the reasoned truth about you.
17. Give feedback.
From time to time you should give out advice. But you need to be careful, because you risk becoming an office critic. So, along with advice, tell people about their successes.
18. Never say: “That’s not my job!”
The trash can is overflowing and you go out for a smoke? Throw out trash along the way. A comrade has gathered in a conference room, and his hands are busy with drawings? Help him carry his bag. This is not your responsibility, but people will do the same for you.
19. Anticipate needs.
“I already did it!” - your boss's favorite soul balm. This way, you will make it clear to your superiors that there is someone else who cares about the fate of the company. In the future, you will become the one whose advice your boss will listen to.
20. And again little things.
Grab coffee for your partner or flowers for your older colleague who got a promotion today, or let the pizza delivery surprise all members of your team, which you will pay for from the bonus for the completed project. Everyone has a hard day ahead, and small signs of attention will do wonders.
21. Say “no” more often.
Rejection can help gain respect. Yes, yes, that's not a typo. When people think that you cannot refuse, they will start wiping their feet on you. Having your own opinion, and defending it with the confidence of a righteous person, you will earn unprecedented respect. You believe in your beliefs, are determined only for success and are ready to do anything for the sake of a goal - this should be your prayer in the morning.
22. Have your own opinion.
True leaders don't agree with everything. They have their own opinion on everything. But you need to take care of your own opinion in advance: form it, justify it, prove it and, just in case, refute it yourself. Your opinion may coincide with someone else's, but it should always be your own.
23. Respect other people's opinions.
Don't dig a grave for others. When proving your opinion, take into account someone else’s. Learn to compromise. You will always have to weigh decisions to make sure everyone is comfortable. This is the only way each team member can work with full dedication.
24. Speak loudly.
Nothing indicates insecurity more clearly than muttering. Always speak so that everyone can hear you from anywhere in the room. Speak clearly without swallowing your endings. Avoid vague words: “I think we can do it...” or “I think it will work...”.
25. Avoid gossip.
People always discuss strong people. Rise above this, don't waste time on empty chatter. Talk to your colleagues as individuals, rather than just asking about their business. Be willing to help them if they are willing to open up to you.
26. Don't waste other people's time.
There is no greater way to show respect for a person than to show how much you value their time. Don't ask questions that you can answer yourself. Don't make appointments you don't need.
27. Organize useful meetings.
People are always thinking about what they could be doing instead of what they are doing at the moment. This is how human nature works. So make sure you all will benefit from spending time together, and make sure there is a good reason for meeting.
28. Work independently.
Now I'm talking about the moment when you are faced with a responsible task, and you don't know what to do or what to do next. Before going to your superiors to resolve the issue, work through each option yourself. It is better to ask your bosses for approval than to appear on the carpet with the question: “What should I do?”
29. Don’t say: “I don’t know!”
Never respond this way to someone asking for help. Better refer him to someone who knows or try to solve the problem together. You may have been his last hope.
30. Become a leading speaker.
Firstly, a good speech gives you an advantage in meetings - everyone will think that you are a consummate leader (in other words, you will gain a certain amount of credibility). Secondly, you will be comfortable when people perceive you as a confident person. Moreover, such practice will bear fruit in daily communication.
31. Work on empathy and authority at the same time.
You need to find that balance when people appreciate the warmth in communicating with you, but also recognize your authority. In this situation, they know who to trust, but they will also listen. You won't be a tyrant for them, but you won't be that friend with whom you can only talk about girls and have a drink at the bar.
32. Separate personal and work time.
People will value your time more if they know you don't work after 6 because you have dinner with your family, or don't check email on the weekends because your vacation home doesn't have internet.
33. Don't leave at 17:00.
Follow through. Especially when the work really needs to be completed today. But don't let your boss think you're willing to sleep at work.
34. Be considerate of your colleagues.
Chat with your colleagues, find out about their preferences. Maybe some people work better in silence, others like it when all the information is presented in written form rather than in lengthy voice messages. Help them improve their performance.
35. Be a helper.
When something goes wrong with your partner, instead of being angry, show initiative. Your work together will be more effective if you help him. He will probably appreciate it.
36. Be a mentor.
Take junior employees under your wing, even if they don't ask for it. Consult them on all issues: from simple unspoken rules to issues of career advancement. Higher-ranking employees will probably notice this.
37. Help newbies.
As soon as a newcomer comes to your company, immediately greet him and let him know that you are ready to help. He will immediately note in you the image of a responsive leader.
38. Raise champions.
Are you proud of your students/subordinates? Share your employees' goals and do everything in your power to help them achieve their goals. Help develop the necessary skills, organize courses and seminars for your employees.
39. Go up.
Don't wait for your manager to tell you. Ask him yourself. Initiative is an important trait for a leader. When your boss realizes that he is grooming a successor, everyone in your office will understand it.
40. Don't complain.
Are you tired, stuck in one place, feeling like a broken record, sick, staying overtime every day, etc.? Never whine. At least in the workplace. Let everyone think that you have a positive attitude towards work, that you love what you do.
41. Watch the world.
Keep track of what's happening in your industry around the world. Read relevant articles, share them with colleagues and management. Give them the opportunity to also follow the latest developments in the world of your business.
42. Ask yourself.
What makes great leaders different is that they can ask themselves, are they really on the right track?
Marcel Garipov based on website material
Have you ever noticed that good people are often disrespected? They help others, are patient, do not harbor grudges, but for some reason they constantly feel upset and lonely. Psychologists believe that the reason for this is errors in the behavior of such people. Today we will help you understand them.
Useless self-sacrifice
You ignore your own needs for the sake of others, but the world simply does not notice. And even if people insult you, you consider yourself to blame. This approach will inevitably lead to people frustrating you over and over again. Don't be afraid to tell the world if you don't like something. This will help you attract people with the same interests as you. On the other hand, unnecessary self-sacrifice most often goes unnoticed.
Lack of self-esteem
You don't seem to feel when other people are being rude to you, or you just turn a blind eye to these "little inconveniences." But a naturally rude person will never love or respect you for this. So why do you continue to tolerate this? If someone acts like they don't care about you, then it really is true. Don't make excuses for rude people. Respect yourself.
You depend on the approval of others
People who have a pathological need for approval from others subconsciously give off signals that something is wrong with them. But those around them do not want to communicate with people who are somehow different from them. Stop expecting praise. You don't need to hear about how good a person you are to actually be one. And don't be afraid of criticism. People will criticize you for almost everything for one reason or another. Your opinion of yourself should always be the most important.
You look for the source of problems only within yourself
You automatically assume that everyone around you is right, except when it comes to yourself. You believe that you yourself are responsible for everything that happens around you. Remember that no one will thank you for this, but they may take advantage of you and make your life even more difficult. Finding the culprits is a thankless task. It will bring you neither love nor pity. Instead, focus your efforts on finding a solution to the problem.
Boasting
If you constantly try to emphasize your strengths and ask for respect, then you are in a dependent relationship. The more you try to convince others that you are a good person, the more often you will receive refusal. Even if you really are.
You can show others that you are worth something only if you sincerely believe in it. If you know your worth, you won't need to prove it to anyone.
Fear of Rejection
You don't want to upset anyone, even if it means inconvenience to you. You pretend that everything is fine so that others won't worry if you're not happy with something. As a result, you are very often dissatisfied with what is happening around you.
Don't be afraid to say no. Even the best people in the world can try to take advantage of you if you let them. Help others only if you really want to.
Ignoring one's own interests
You are used to adapting to the needs of other people, so it is difficult for you to understand your own desires. You yourself cannot decide what to do, so you always listen to outside opinions. If you are unable to make decisions and feel helpless, other people are unlikely to respect you. Learn to listen to your own desires and do not be afraid that you may offend others. Most likely, your fears are far from reality, and you can always find a compromise.
You cannot define the boundaries of what is permitted
You always forgive others, because it is easier to do than to stand up for yourself. Even if others disrespect you, you make excuses for them. It is important to define your own boundaries of acceptable behavior so that you do not allow others to cross them with you. People who allow everything do not command respect.
Fear of loneliness
You turn your relationship into a cult, sacrificing yourself. Moreover, doing this makes you feel comfortable. Perhaps this is why you only meet bullies, narcissists and selfish people, because you allow yourself to be used.
You shouldn't have to choose between your relationship and your self-esteem. If you have to make this choice, something has gone wrong. Be bold and don't be afraid of change. Think of solitude as freedom, and you will never be on your own for long.
You think respect has to be earned
You agree that respect should be a result of action or behavior. As a result, you do not feel comfortable if your relationship with someone is equal because you strongly believe that respect must be earned. You think that a person has value only if they have done something.
The truth is that love or respect cannot be “bought.” Learn to love and be loved unconditionally, and your relationships with other people will become much easier.
